Posts

Finding Yourself...Again

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At 12, I discovered my love for dance. I will dance till my feet hurt on slow and fast songs alike. As I grew older, I found art and I felt like it found me too. I started to see people and places through the eyes of art. Now much older and able to travel on my own, I realise how tiring road trips could be, yet I love them so! I made a decision to tour many countries in the world someday and I was determined to work hard to afford this. At 21, I met the love of who completed me, understood me, shared my passion for life and by the next year we said I do before loved ones. It was the best day of my life. At 23, I had my own baby, a girl, she is everything and more. Like every child, she was demanding of my time, attention and love. I struggled with the balance, my work, marriage, parenting and living. Between all of this, I lost myself, my dreams, passion and I feel entrapped as much as I try to ignore it. I need help! This fictional story is the reality of many men and women toda...

The Hardest Wait

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I often appear patient on the surface. Deep down, I sometimes feel like the most impatient person on earth. Recently, I had a reason to take my ward for a surgical procedure. We were scheduled for 11am and prepared to get it over with in no time. Upon arrival at about that time, we saw several people waiting to have similar procedures and scheduled for the same time as we were. So the wait began, I counted minutes and then hours. 12, 1, 2, 3…4. I was screaming on my inside from restlessness, yet seated in the same chair hour after hour, afraid to step out and miss our slot. Finally, it was one person to go before us, yet I found it the longest wait. Reminding myself time and time again, ‘you are next’. Each minute thereafter felt like hours so it got me thinking, why is waiting hardest when the leap forward is closest?? - The wait for a positive pregnancy test result - The job wait - The celibacy wait - The marital wait - That call that will change everything The list is e...

Dear Church...

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This is my first open letter to you. I want to start by saying I am as guilty. When you read, you will know what I mean. Let’s go back to the basics before the doctrines, the rules, the biases, the judgement that has beclouded the truth in its raw state. God’s word didn’t change because the times changed. There is a reason He is the same yesterday, today and forever. Stop making it look like God changed. Maybe we changed and somehow want to justify it by the times. Dear Church, we are losing the battle, because we have forgotten we are at war (supernatural warfare). We bother ourselves with frivolities that don’t affect God in the real sense. We tear each other down and cannot even agree on the core things like the cross, salvation and eternity. What has tribe, race and denomination got to do with the love of Christ? Why are we encumbered with thoughts about whose Church is better? Why does it now bother us who sings with who? Why do we rejoice when our brethren backslide (does...

Chip Off The Old Block

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Coming soon... Chip Off The Old Block is a suspense-filled compilation of short stories by my dad and I. It explores the intricate details of true-to-life characters; Ajama’s deceptive look and dreamy nature are his greatest assets. Can the means at his disposal guarantee the end he desperately desires? The enraged Apati seeks revenge at the expense of everything he holds dear. Between his passion and pain, family and fear, he undertakes mission impossible and embraces the consequence. Michelle hoped for the best. Daring and endearing, lovely and amusing; her dreams and ideas hold true in a world that seem set on the opposite. Surviving the odds, courage is inevitable. "Look before you leap". What if your leap would save the day? Mr Gaze exudes confidence, character and candor. Mastering his art was easy, playing the game was fun till love got in the way. What do you do when the need that stares you in the face also scar...

Baba Eleran aka My Meat Seller

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He was a dark skinned chubby man. I had planned to pass by the day we first met, he beckoned with a pleasant smile and offered me an unbelievable discount and an assurance I will be back. He was right, from that day he became my eleran aka meatman. This remained the case for another 3 years thereafter. He will send meat to me through my wards without taking money and leave me with the responsibility of coming to him to settle the bill at my convenience. He was proactive, invested in his trade and had a loud mouth. He always had gist. He will offer me a sit when I was heavily pregnant knowing he was going to make me bargain for a long time. The irony was how he always convinced me to buy more than I needed. One day as I headed home from work, I couldn’t find him, I asked around and was told he was very ill. I called him and he assured me it was an ailment he could take care of in his village. He resurfaced months after, he didn’t seem much like himself anymore. I pleaded with him t...
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They told me I could sing the house down; then I sang. They said if I read up some more I will be the next big thing; then I read. They said if only I had more panache; I mastered it. They said if I were taller, fairer, darker, thicker etc. They thought they could define, restrain and conform me to their limited minds.…they lost me there. Amidst who they made me to be, I couldn’t find who I set out to be. I wanted to dance till my feet hurt, I wanted to sing and then I didn’t want to anymore. I wanted to build castles and I was ready to work to learn how to. I wanted to light up a room when I walked in and slide in through the back on other days. I wanted to speak before Kings and have them take notes, I wanted to curl up on my bed and read myself to sleep too. I wanted to find faith and walk in it, I wanted to fail on my own terms and find faith again. Here I was, sitting, counting the opportunities I missed and the ones I shouldn’t have. Living backwards, defeated b...

TAKE OFF THAT LID!!!

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On my mind today are the things we cover, the things we protect, the things we defend. They could be habits; those habits we cannot allow ourselves admit we have and the good clothes and poise hide on the outside. They could be abuse, emotionally, verbally or physically. They could be symptoms that can graduate into sicknesses or diseases. They could be mental imbalances that require professional support to manage and you consistently tell yourself is unreal and convince yourself you are thinking it up. My God! We hide too much in Nigeria. Its like one is sworn to some form of secrecy from childhood that makes you silent when a trusted uncle fondles your private part, the kind of silence that makes you a slave to your habits yet no one must know you even imagined the habit to start with. The kind of silence that makes people move from mood swings to full blown depression and they cannot help themselves. The kind of silence that makes a man suicidal because he is wailing inside but s...